Tired Thoughts

Tired Thoughts

Pairings: one-sided Bloodshed/ F!Thornstriker
Rating: PG (violence mentioned)
Warnings: AU, gender bent, godverse, human, OCs
Word Count: 1,201

This AU, Bloodshed, Bombrush, and Thornstriker belong to xLosersRuleTheWorldx

XXXGODXXX

He was very tired.  So very tired.  It had been a while since he had come back from that trip.

No, not trip.  The trial.  His trial.  His trial for humanity.

He had all but certainly proved his case.  The humans were no good, selfish, cowardly creatures who didn't deserve the respect gods gave them.  They were vile, merciless killers who killed for fun, for power, for lust, for every possible sin in existence.

They needed to be destroyed.  All of them, every last one of them, down to the last one - they had to die.  They couldn't exist.  Warnings and punishments couldn't change their nature; nothing the gods had done before had changed them for the better.

Which was why the only option left was the right one.  Humanity had to be exterminated, wiped out from the face of both worlds.

Other gods had tried to stop him.  He had simply walked over their bloody corpses.  His father, the Council, no, not even the Council could stop him.  He had only played along with Bombrush's suggestion to prove without a doubt he was right.  That he had been right about humanity ever since that day.

Ever since they took his mother away from him.

But she... but that human...

No, she had to have been a trick.  A creation of one of the gods to cheat at this trial.  She was just an apparition, a thing created to force him to lose this trial.

But there was no one with that ability.  No god could create warm, living bodies to do the things that she had done.  That girl... she was alive.  She was moving.  She was talking, walking, and breathing.  She was a real thing.

There was no way such a human could exist.  Bloodshed had thought for a moment that maybe the Council or Bombrush enlisted the service of a smaller god to force the trial's end.  That said god or goddess would be greatly rewarded if she did this.

Bloodshed turned over in his bed.  What was he thinking?  What minor god would risk death by his hand just to earn some favor with his father or the Council?  Did they not think he wouldn't be suspicious of one single human who went through all that trouble taking care of him?  Who would do that?  Who would think that do all that after years of no one even looking at him would be enough to not make him suspicious?

But he knew no one who looked like that.  There was no one in the realm of gods who even looked like her.

That girl... How was it even possible?  How could... How could such a human exist?  She had not only approached him, a dark and suspicious character, but she had even let him into her own home!  Why?!  Who would do such a thing?  If she had done it to any other person other than him, she would have been attacked in her own home.  Robbed of all her belongings, raped in her own bedroom, tortured and played with before they killed her.

Why?!  Why would such a person do that?  Did she not understand what happened in the that world?  Had she been sheltered her entire life by her parents?  Or was she mentally ill?  Maybe that was why her brother kept her inside?

But if... if a person was incapable of thinking that someone like himself wasn't suspicious and let them into their home, how could they tend to him?

The girl... she had cleaned his 'wounds'.  She had bandaged them.  She had cooked for him, made the bed for him, and even started the fire to light the house and all.

A person mentally unfit could not do all that.

Blinking away the gunk forming under his eyes, the God of Wrath reached out to the small pile of cloth on the side of his bed.  It stank, but so did the sheets and the room.  That was what happened when you stayed in your room for three weeks straight and only left to relieve yourself and eat a little.

It was her bandages, her own supply of bandages that she had wasted on someone like him.  A being that would have killed her without any hesitation.  He would have...

But he... he didn't want to anymore.  She wasn't... She wasn't like the rest of humanity.  She was... different.

She couldn't possibly be human.

He brought the bandage in his hand closer, studying its strands and stains.  He could still recall the touch of it when she had bandaged him up.  He could even remember her hands being on his skin when she was tending to him.

He could remember it all.  Her touch, her smell, her voice.  Her kind smile and her soul-piercing blue eyes.

And her name... Thornstriker.  Thornstriker.  Thornstriker was her name.

Thornstriker was the being who saved him.  Was the one to show him kindness and compassion.

She couldn’t' be a human.  She had to be a forgotten goddess.  She had to be an angel.  Or maybe even Primus itself.

But no... No, she was a human.  She was a human being.  And he had nearly killed her.

What had... What had he been thinking?  How could he... he felt sick, curling up to try and hold back the bile going up his throat.  He had almost killed her.  He would have ended the life of someone so pure.  Someone so angelic and greater than anything this plane of existence deserved to have.

He should have been throwing himself at her feet, no, before her.  Not on his knees, but lower.  Prostrated on the ground for her to beg for forgiveness.  He should have been apologizing until his voice gave out.

She... Thornstriker was someone who should have been worshipped, loved, adored.  She was a saintly creature to be protected from the cruelty of her race.  ...And from him.  From a monster like him.  Who had almost killed her.

What was he doing here hiding like a coward?  He should go back to her, fall to his knees, no, his stomach before her and kiss her feet until his lips dried out.

She deserved better.  She deserved more than an apology from him.

Bloodshed sat up in bed, grunting as he pulled the bandage in his hand with him as he stared into nothingness.

He shouldn't be here.  He was no coward like those lowly humans were.  He was a god.  He was one of the most powerful gods in existence.  He did not cower before humans.

Except for her.  Except for Thornstriker.

He could not face her.  Not after what he had just done.

But... But he had to see her again.  He had to be certain she wasn't just a trick of the mind.

Gripping the bandages, he got out of bed slowly and moved to head to the bathroom to finally clean himself off.

He could not even be near her in such a dirty state.  Even if he couldn’t' remove all the filth that he had on him and his soul, he still had to look somewhat presentable.

Thornstriker did not deserve anything less.

END